Rowan's Birth Story

Ok, so there's not chronological order to these blogs so far, nor have I really introduced myself. Oh well, it's time to write Baby Rowan's birth story.

I'll start at the beginning. On our wedding night we got pregnant with Rowan. We knew we could, and it was sort of magical, being our big day. Avery was actually four months old, but they count back from the first day of your last period, so their due date set them to be thirteen months apart to the day.

Before the expected date of the monthly visitor, I was supremely grouchy and hormonal. Not much different than the last year growing, and having Avery. I decided to buy a pregnancy test, and went for the all out cheap two pack. I actually took one a few days before, and the line changed into a plus sign, but it was very faint. I honestly thought it was wrong, that I'd bought the cheap test, and should've splurged the extra couple bucks. I threw it in the trash, and kept going back every couple of minutes to see if maybe it turned into a darker pink line. I didn't even tell anyone about it.

So I'm one day late, and have a roaring fight with Steve. I went to the bathroom saw the test, and thought, "What the hell, take the other one." It turned to a bright pink plus sign right away. My honest reaction was, "Oh, that makes sense." I came out of the bathroom, put the positive test beside Steve, and said, "I'm pregnant", then walked away. We forgot the fight, and were really happy.

I tandem nursed Avery until I was about six months along. She wanted to fall asleep nursing, and it was getting really hard on my growing belly. She also was starving, I could only make two ounces when full, which wasn't enough for her demanding milk diet. And of course when she started solids, she became severely constipated, and has poo fear problems ever since. My midwife, Emma, told us to make the switch to formula, and sadly we did. It was hard for me, but about a week or so after the switch, and she was gaining weight again, I got over it. I mean I liked having my body somewhat back to myself again too.

We had our standard ultrasound at five months gestation. The same doctor as Avery's gave it to us again. It was funny, I almost think he'd have told us her sex, but I got freaked out, and said I wasn't sure I'd want to know. Poor Steve, I drove him loony with both girls, asking him at least five times a day if he thought they were boys or girls. The hospital now has 3d ultrasound, so I kept trying to laugh and cough, in hopes I'd see the privates. It didn't work. We have the picture of her in 3d, but not on the computer. The scan was taking a really long time, and he wasn't telling us why. He even left the room to look at Avery's file. We left unsettled. You know how doctors avoid telling you things.

I told Deborah about it at my next midwife appt., and so she set up another ultrasound, to make sure there was no lobe on Rowan's placenta, like there was on Avery's. The next scan was short and sweet, they found nothing, and confirmed the placenta's placement was on the front of my belly. I found relief from that because I rarely felt her move until I was almost seven months along.

My pregnancy went by very quickly until the last month or so. I was extremely fatigued, and power napped with Avery every chance we had. I also had pain from my pubic bone separating, and could barely walk to the end of the driveway without excruciating pain. Being pregnant for two years straight wreaked havoc on my pelvis, and with weekly chiropractic care, and yoga when I can, I'm slowly getting better. I actually think the last trimester was way harder than having the girls now at their current age and high demands.

I had another pregnancy photo shoot, this time with Crystal Clear Photography, at about 35 weeks along. Here is one of my favourite photos from it:


The start of the pregnancy I thought she's come on her due date, but the last half I thought early for sure. Especially when the midwives were saying any day at thirty-seven weeks. I was spoiled from Avery being born one week early, and those last three weeks dragged on forever!

The afternoon of the twenty-ninth, Deborah checked me out to see if I was dilated, and I wasn't. My cervix was still pretty far back, but she thought it could be because I'm six feet tall. A little show happened, but we couldn't be sure. I thought I'd be overdue for sure, and wanted to shoot myself.

That night around eight-ish, I started having a couple uncomfortable braxton hicks contractions. We planned to call our midwives early, being our second baby, and labours are significantly fast. We live twenty minutes out of town, half an hour speeding to the hospital. I called Chelsea and Lisa (my Douala support peeps) and let them know that I thought it might be tonight. I then called Pants, who was taking Avery for us. I wasn't sure, but let her know I was in prelabour.

Actual prelabour lasted one hour, and I was having strong contractions all over the map. Steve didn't think he should take Avery to Pant's yet, but I forced him to because I was so scared to have fast full blown labour by myself, and it would take over half an hour for him to go and come back. Once she was gone, I had a shower, lit candles with aromatherapy, played my beautiful cd from my yoga teacher, and sat on my exercise ball.

I rocked on the ball until about ten-thirty, or so, and started having contractions about 5 minutes apart. Half an hour later, the contractions were still regular, so we called Deborah and the girls at about eleven. Lisa picked up Chelsea, they dropped her son off, then got here about one am or so, and Deborah arrived shortly before that time.

Deborah checked my cervix, on the couch, and I was only one cm dilated. I felt like a fool calling them there, and having barely any change. I mean with Avery, I had waited until six cm. We decided everyone should try and get some sleep, and so everyone else had about an hour, but I was having furious contractions, on my bed, and I didn't sleep. After that hour, I asked Deborah to check me again because I was really having to work with the contractions. Low and behold I had opened to four cm, in that one hour.

Deborah sat at the dining room table mostly, writing out my progress of labour and drank tea, while Steve, Lisa, Chels, and I hung out on my bed labouring some more. Our midwife was letting me have my home birth, and keeping her distance a bit because she had a cold. I really wanted her here because she delivered Avery, and it was really special to have her at both births. Being on the bed was like a giant slumber party, lots of laughing and talking. Well, except the regular contractions reminding me i was in labour.

I'm not sure how much time had gone by, maybe an hour or two, but Deborah decided to check the progress again, and I was at seven cm. Steve had already filled the birth pool, in our room, beside our bed. He topped it off with some fresh hot water, and Deborah put her trusty turtle thermometer in it. It's important for the water to be at a certain temperature for the baby.

The birth pool was absolutely amazing! I felt so much lighter, and was able to move around freely during contractions. It lifted alot of gravity, and I was drifting around comfortably in so many ways I couldn't have out of water. We borrowed the tub from the midwive's office, and bought the liner for it. It is also thoroughly cleaned between and after, so there's nothing weird or gross about reusing the tub. There's two handles inside of the tub, for pushing if I wanted to birth baby in the tub. When filled with air, the bottom had like two layers, basically a pillow effect for under my bottom. Indeed the tub was the best place to be during transition, and I found myself whizzing through the hardest part of labour.

I did have to get out to pee, though, and that was getting harder and harder. It's not too far to the toilet, but having contractions in the bathroom sucked big time. I think I was around eight cm or so, when I threw up into the bathroom sink. Pretty standard in the transitional stages of labour. Just another sign baby is coming soon. Chelsea made sure I kept drinking diluted apple juice, to keep my fluids and sugar going.

I'm not sure how long I actually laboured in the tub, I think it must have been an hour to two tops, when in that time, Deborah decided to call for backup. It's standard to have two midwives when delivering during a home birth, just like a nurse and doctor in the hospital. I was still in the tub, labouring hard, when Jessica came over. There was a shift in the energy, and I wish she'd come a bit earlier. I think because our house is out of town, it took her longer to get here. During office appointments, you usually see just one midwife, and I also wish they rotated the visits, so you could be comfortable with everyone, and not feel disappointed if baby time comes, and your regular midwife isn't available. She is a beautiful person, but at the time I was so far into labour, I shouldn't have cared who saw me savage, but I did a wee bit.

The bed was then set up, I had everything in plastic bags, washed, folded, and labeled. My virgo Deborah was very impressed with my anal organisation and thorough cleanliness. I got onto the bed, and didn't feel too shy with Jess then, and was checked. I was plateauing at about eight cm, just like when I was in labour with Avery. You know, the whole labour for both girls was actually very similar, except with Rowan I didn't really have a warm up, just a couple mild contractions! I asked Deborah to break my waters, and get it moving, same as I did before. The contractions were intense and overlapping each other, in that last bit, and I started crying. The pressure from baby, and the heaviness out of water was excoriating. Not painful per say, but definitely a true test of a woman's strength to work through.

I kept crying and saying, "I'm going to have a baby." I think repeating it was a way for me to get myself through the tough time I was in. I then started feeling that bear down sensation to push. Deborah checked me, I was at nine cm, just like Avery's birth, and so she pushed the lip of the cervix in, while I had to push Rowan's head past it. I forgot that detail in Avery's story, and both times it hurt like hell. Simply being checked makes you want to kick the midwife in the face, but that to me was the absolute worst feeling besides crowning.

So there I am trying to push, and I kept sliding all over the stupid plastic sheet on the bed. I also wasn't trying all the way. Internally I felt terrified of crowning baby. I knew what the ring of fire would feel like, and didn't want to feel it again. It took forty five minutes total in that stage, which is a long time for a second baby. Chelsea came up on the bed with me, and let me grab onto her for support, while Steve sat beside me encouraging me, and Lisa was taking pictures. I still feel queasy about grabbing Chelsea's side like I was, I mean I was squeezing the hardest I could. Oops, friend, I love you and am sorry! Jessica kept telling me I wasn't pushing hard enough, which I guess she meant as encouraging, but it was pissing me off! I found out later that I was glaring at her in between contractions, and I yelled at her, too, saying, "I'm trying as hard as I f##$ing can!"

Deborah intervened and just checked in with me, I cried about crowning, and said I didn't want to. She encouraged me that it wouldn't take long, and reminded me that I had to. So I had another pushing contraction, which for me gives me about three to five good pushes. Rowan crowned for a sec, went back in, when a big gush of blood came out. Deborah yelled, "Get that baby out now!" And so I did, with one giant push. See, the blood gush meant early placenta separation; otherwise, no oxygen for baby. There was no time for nice oil massage or very much help on getting her out, it was very fast. I think because she was my second, I had little damage, but totally would have if she'd been the first!

They put Rowan on my chest, she cried right away, and was totally rooting right from the start. She was cheesy, and had Steve's eyebrow scowl at first appearance. After the shot of oxytocin, and I birthed her placenta, they took baby for weight, and all of that good stuff. She was eight pounds even. Her placenta was huge, and I clearly remember Deborah commenting on how robusque it was. It's in our freezer, waiting to be planted next spring, when I make a special little garden dedicated to the girls. I'm going to fill it with their birth flowers, amongst other things.

Rowan had a good latch right from the start, and we had a power nap together before Steve picked up Avery. I did end up getting an infection in my uterus, which is super rare from home births, and stayed three nights in the hospital. It sucked, but Rowan was with me, and I caught up on sleep I was not getting at home. As much as I love the water and the comfort of home, I think the hospital is great too, especially for second time Momma's, we all need recovery time!

I think that about sums it up, it was a magical, comfortable, and empowering birth. I'm really happy I didn't chicken out, and was so blessed to have it all work out safely. The best part of course was Rowan, and that I gave Avery a baby sister, on my big sister's birthday!

Here's a few pictures of Rowan in the beginning: